Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize