you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
We named our party play list daddy issues
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
