If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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