Me too!
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
