how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
