This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
