playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
