I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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