No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize