hotel room ftw
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
