What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
