dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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