Porn is love you can see.
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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