tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
