Midget sex pt 2 tonight
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
No subtext here. People are naked.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
