It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
