Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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