Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
