Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
