that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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