he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
