Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
