Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
My bed is full of blood and feathers
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
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