ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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