that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
