My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
