I wanna passion pit in your ass
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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