I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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