I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
