Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
