How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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