U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
