I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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