Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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