There was a lot of him and a little penis
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
