turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize