office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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