drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I will be naked everywhere
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
