WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
they're like a gay fantastic four
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
