it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
