Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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