so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
