I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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