are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
