why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
babies were throwing up all over the place
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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