we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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