well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
