I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
