I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
When are your genitals available?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Never let your siblings swipe right.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize