Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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