we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
