that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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